


Painting Pictures With Broad Strokes (This Is A Still Life)

by Aoife



Category: British Military - Fandom
Genre: Did I Just Break the Fourth Wall?, Gen, Locked Because I Have Shame, Personifications of Military Units, Somewhat Cracked, What Have I Done, What Was I Thinking?, Why Did I Write This?, Wranglers Are Not Adult Supervision, Writing Under the Influence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-05-30
Updated: 2013-05-30
Packaged: 2017-12-13 11:22:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 407
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/823715
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aoife/pseuds/Aoife
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"I wasn't expecting quite such a <i>large</i> number of guests, Navy."</p><p>"Some of them are mine," he waved a hand at a large table to one side, "but you can blame the Army for most of them - he's the one who insisted we invite the Territorials as well. It's almost as if he knew this would happen."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Painting Pictures With Broad Strokes (This Is A Still Life)

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Bab El-Wad](https://archiveofourown.org/works/699911) by [Roga](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Roga/pseuds/Roga). 



> I blame Hagar for this. That is all.

"Would somebody please check whether Bristol and Exeter are fighting or fucking; they're making too much noise for us to ignore and some of us have money on which it will be this year."

"And that's my cue to make sure all of the offices are locked. I'd really rather not have to disinfect my desk in the morning." One of the younger individuals peeled herself away from the Adjutant General's Corps's table. "And someone," she looked pointedly at one of the others still seated at the table, "should probably go make sure the main gate and armoury is secure before the alcohol starts to really flow." 

"And who put _you_ in charge, Staff and Personnel?" Asked Guard Services bitterly. Police, Legal Services and Education ignored their putative siblings bickering and all went back to their rather large whiskys. 

"No one. But it needs to be done, and I have the ability to cut off your tab and suspend your expenses." She answered sweetly.

"Bitch." He hissed and slid out. "And who's bright idea was it to stick all of _us_ together, anyway?" He muttered on the way out the mess.

* * *

"Mess rules apply, gentlemen. In other words, human forms please, and not _naked_ this time; I've already sent Marines and Paras back to barracks to get themselves more appropriately attired." The Royal Navy tapped his foot. "Why those two consider cross-dressing so much fun, I do not know."

The tiger stretched. "Spoil our fun, why don't you." He shook himself then stretched, shifting back to human form, complete with mess dress and medals. "Come on, Lancaster, drinking time's a wasting, and he's already told us neither the Marines or the Paras are here yet."

* * *

"Would someone _please_ tell the Yeomanries to stop bickering over their order of precedence? I know we said mess rules for this, but we're not playing everyone's marches so it doesn't matter, and they're giving me a headache!" Army complained. "I didn't want to _think_ about precedence issues tonight, thank you. The Scottish Regiments are _still_ crowing over the fact they're all now ahead of the English ones thanks to the last round of amalgamations. Amalgamations which made no sense at all if anyone had asked _me_ about them …" he finished a bit plaintively. "Which no one did, of course. And there's going to be another round after they finish with the redundancies and it's just going to make the mess _worse_."


End file.
